the day was just usual. trying to update the things that havent changed in last 6 years. these days i pass little time at Anti Clock, where u can find me making smoke rings. man, its a hard job, not as easy as it looks. but i m getting grip on it.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Friday, October 10, 2008
street fight
i had no expectation that this fight would go this far. its been 2 days of that night, and matter has not been solved yet. hope the capter will be closed 2moro. but this was really funny of DP and his original name. well, life goes on and on. navaratri is finished and Ravan is still alive. he has not been burn down this time.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
the most most most memorable night of my life
its 6.47 am, and i had no chance to have a nice sleep last night. what we had today, i donno was it funny or damn serious. i guess its damn serious, and i dont want to face this kinda shit again in my life. it was the most most most memorable night of my life. i dont know why but i had some kinda sixth sense abt DP that something is going to be wrong with him. i didnt know it wud happen so quickly, with in half an hour. and it took whole night to get out of that situation, and guess what?? its not over yet.
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Ey Karay Kya Koiii... Karay Kya Koi Woh Jo Aaein Yakayak
Nigaahon Ko Rokay Ya Dil Ko Sambhalay
Khuda Janay Kya Ho Jo Nazrein Utha Lein
Bus Itni Si Doori, Yeh Mein Hoon Ya Manzil
Kahan Aake Phootay Hein Paaon K Chaalay
Qaasid Payam E Khat Ko Daina Bohot Na Tool
Bus Mukhtasir Yeh Kehna K Ub
Kaho koi kaise muhabbat chupa lay
a heavenly treat
its just like routine Saturday. Rajvadu was on full waiting, so we moved to Choice, the right choice, as we had to wait for less than 10 mins. the food was gr8. and the waiter, how cud he remember the order of 12 items?? he was simply genius. and than we moved to Wide Angle, havmor. actually i can not eat ice cream these days, but as i was with friends, i cudnt resist as they were having 2 cups of ice creams. and i think that Chocolate Fantasy was simply superb. of course the cookie cream is all time favorite. now it was not just ordinary saturday night. it was a special one!!
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
osho and love

osho says if someone wants to fall in love, the first thing he must do is destroy his ego. Love can not born in the existence of Ego. one must die to reborn in life of love. Ego is the barrier that will not let the tree of love grow. one must learn to lean to fall in love. "jab 'main' tha tab 'hari' nahi, jab 'hari' hai to 'main' nahi!! one must destroy his ego to see the eternal love, and destroying ego is more difficult than facing death. but a man without ego is full of love. just like a tree...the tree bended to ground has the more fruits than others.
one more thing i like abt osho is Dream. we dream of those things which we want to achieve, which we have not achieve, which doesn't belong to us, with we do not own. a bagger dream of money, a hungry man dreams food, a pedestrian dreams car.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
home sweet home
today was the day, dedicated to new home. the whole day was spent on site with interior designer. damn, its too difficult to choose a floor tile. i wonder when i will finish the whole house??? it was Happy Birthday of pinky as well. there was nothing to celebrate, but we are going out next week. nothing is happening these days. same shit different days. just got confirmation that she hates me, hah !! (its official now.)
Saturday, September 20, 2008
2 days at village
it was a great experience to spend some time at Choki Dhani, jaipur. the fist time i entered the resort, i felt like i was in total different world. it was simply wonderful. Jaipur was so beautiful too, specially in the dark. And the Choki Dhani village was simply a experience oyut of this world. yaa, the rain ruined some fun, but overall it was a superb. the service and quality of food was excellent.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
we r stlll alive !!
god saved the day. it was the day of experiment, and if any thing would have gone wrong, i wudnt have written this article and u wudnt be reading this either. it was believed to be the End of the Earth. may be i was the last one to hear the news. but is there anything to fear?? human beings are so stupid. its ok to be feared by something that u dont know. uncertainty can scare. but death is certain and truth of life. so is there anything to be feared. may the uncertainty of time is scary for them. people always overvalue THINGS, that really doesn't make them happy. and end of the day all they get is sadness and emptiness. so just live the day as its the last of day, and celebrate it as yr first birthday.
Friday, September 05, 2008
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Friday, August 29, 2008
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
happy birthday krishna
wishing a very very happy birthday krishna. the best friend of mine. hes being guide, mentor, friend, lover and everything to me. thanks krishna for being with me all the time, to share my good and bad times.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Saturday, August 16, 2008
I got a disease
Feels like you made a mistake
You made somebodys heart break
But now I have to let you go
I have to let you go
You left a stain
On every one of my good days
But I am stronger than you know
I have to let you go
No ones ever turned you over
No ones tried
To ever let you down,
Beautiful girl
Bless your heart
I got a disease
Deep inside me
Makes me feel uneasy baby
I cant live without you
Tell me what I am supposed to do about it
Keep your distance from it
Dont pay no attention to me
I got a disease
Feels like youre making a mess
Youre hell on wheels in a black dress
You drove me to the fire
And left me there to burn
Every little thing you do is tragic
All my life, oh was magic
Beautiful girl
I cant breathe
I got a disease
Deep inside me
Makes me feel uneasy baby
I cant live without you
Tell me what I am supposed to do about it
Keep your distance from it
Dont pay no attention to me
I got a disease
I think that Im sick
But leave me be while my world is coming down on me
You taste like honey, honey
Tell me can I be your honey
Be, be strong
Keep telling myself it that wont take long till
Im free of my disease
Yeah well free of my disease
Free of my disease
I got a disease
Deep inside me
Makes me feel uneasy baby
I cant live without you
Tell me what I am supposed to do about it
Keep your distance from it
Dont pay no attention to me
I got a disease
I think that Im sick
But leave me be while my world is coming down on me
You taste like honey, honey
Tell me can I be your honey
Be, be strong
Keep telling myself it that wont take long till
Im free of my disease
Yeah well free of my disease
Free of my disease
Friday, August 15, 2008
Happy independence day

Havmor, reopens at wide angle.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
i love rain
Yeah Jo Halka Halka Saroor Hai
Yeah Teri Nazar Ka Qasoor Hai
K Sharab Peena Sikha Diya
Tere Pyar Ne, Teri Chaah Ne
Teri Behki Behki Nigaah Ne
Mujhay Ik Sharabi Bana Diya…
its like dream........setting on the gallery, facing green garden, having a glass full of chilled Virgin Marry in rain like this. its raining, and we call it golden rain, as farmers do. its raining, like showering, for last 2 days. dont want to stop.
Saqi Ki Har Nigah Pay Bal Kha K P Gaya
Lehroon Say Khailta Hoa Lehra K P Gaya
Ey Rehmat-E-Tamaam Meri Har Khata Muaf
Mein Intiha-E-Shouq (Mein) Say Ghabra K P Gaya
Peta Baghair Izm Yeah Kab Thi Meri Majaal
Dar Pardah Chashm-E-Yaar Ki Shay Pa K P Gaya
Paas Rehta Hai Duur Rehta Hai
Koi Dil Mein Zaroor Rehta Hai
Jab Say Dekha Hai Un Ki Aankhon Ko
Halka Halka Suroor Rehta Hai
Aisay Rehtay Hein Koi Mere Dil Mein
Jaisay Zulmat Mein Noor Rehta Hai
Ub Adam Ka Yeah Haal Hai Har Waqt
Mast Rehta Hai Chuur Rehta Hai
Yeah Joh Halka Halka Saroor Hai
Yeah Teri Nazar Ka Qasoor Hai
K Sharab Peena Sikha Diya
Tairay Pyar Nai, Teri Chaah Nai
Teri Behki Behki Nigaah Nai
Mujhay Ik Sharabi Bana Diya…
Sharab Kaisi (What Drink), Khumaar Kaisa (What Elevation)
Yeah Sub Tumhari Nawazishein Hein (It Is All Your Gift)
Pilai Hai Kiss Nazar Say Tu Nai (How I Have Been Made Into An Addict)
K Mujhko Apni Khabar Nahi Hai (I Have No Awareness Of Myself)
Teri Behki Behki Nigah Nai (Your Lost Looks)
Mujhe Ik Sharabi Bana Dia....
Sara Jahan Must, Jahan Ka Nizam (System) Must
Din Must, Raat Must, Saher (Morning) Must, Shaam Must
Dil Must, Sheesha Must, Sabu (Cup Of Wine) Must, Jaam Must
Hai Teri Chashm-E-Must Say Her Khaas-O-Aam (Everyone) Must
Yoon To Saqi Her Tarah Ki Tere MaiKhane Mein Hai
Woh Bhi Thori Si Jo In Aankhon K Paimane Mein Hai
Sub Samajhta Hoon Teri Ishwa-Kari (Cleverness) Ay Saqi
Kaam Karti Hai Nazar Naam Hai Paimane Ka.. Bus!
Teri Behki Behki Nigah Nai
Mujhe Ik Sharabi Bana Diya...
Tera Pyar Hai Meri Zindagi (My Life Is Your Love)
Tera Pyar Hai Meri Bandagi (I Am Enclosed In Your Love)
Tera Pyar Hai Bas Meri Zindagi, Tera Pyar Hai Bas Meri Zindagi
Na Namaz Aati Hai Mujhko, Na Wazoo Aata Hai
Sajda Kar Leta Hoon, Jab Saamnay Tu Aata Hai
Bus Meri Zindagi Tera Pyar Hai....
Mai Azal Say Banda-E-Ishq Hoon, Mujhe Zohd-O-Kufr Ka Gham Nahin (Deep Down I Am A Lover. I Am Not Sad For Hereafter-Hell)
Mere Sir Ko Dar Tera Mil Gaya, Mujhe Ab Talash-E-Haram Nahi
Meri Bandagi Hai Wo Bandagi, Jo Muqeed-E-Dair-O-Haram (Bounded To Any Sacrad Place) Nahi
Mera Ik Nazar Tumhein Dekhna, Ba Khuda Namaz Se Kam Nahi (For Me To Look At You Is No Less Than Namaz)
Bus Meri Zindagi Tera Pyar Hai...
Bus Meri Zindagi Tera Pyar Hai...
Tera Naam Loon Zubaan Say, Tere Aagay Sir Jhuka Doon
Mera Ishq Keh Raha Hai, Mein Tujhe Khuda Bana Doon
Tera Naam Mere Lub Per, Mera Tazkara Hai Dar Dar
Mujhay Bhool Ja'ay Dunya, Mein Agar Tujhe Bhula Doon
Mere Dil Mein Bus Rahe Hein, Tere Bepanah Jalwe
Na Ho Jiss Mein Noor Tera, Woh Charagh Hi Bujha Doon
Jo Pucha K Kis Tarah Hoti Hai Baarish, Jabeen (Forehead) Se Paseene Ki Boondein Gira Di
Jo Pucha K Kis Tarah Girti Hai Bijli, Nigahein Milaein Mila Kar Jhuka Dein
Jo Pucha Shab-O-Roz Milte Hain Kaise, To Chehre Pe Apne Wo Zulfein Hata Deein
Jo Pucha K Naghmon Mein Jaadu Hai Kaisa, To Meethe Takallum Mein Baatein Suna Deein
Jo Apni Tamanaon Ka Haal Poocha , To Jalti Howi Chand Shamein Bhujha Deein
Main Kehta Reh Gaya Khata-E-Mohabbat Ki Achi Saza Di
Mere Dil Ki Dunya Bana Kar Mita Di, Acha!
Mere Baad Kisko Satao Gay,
Mujhe Kis Tarah Se Mitao Gay
Kahan Ja Ke Teer Chalao Gay
Meri Dosti Ki Balaein Lo
Mujhe Haath Utha Kar Duaein Do, Tumhein Ek Qatil Bana Diya
Mujhe Daikho Khuwahish-E-Jan-E-Jaan
Main Wohi Hoon Anwar-E-Nim Jaan
Tumhain Itna Hosh Tha Jub Kahan
Na Chalao Is Tarah Tum Zaban
Karo Mera Shukriya Meherban
Tumhein Baat Karna Sikha Diya...
Yeh Jo Halka Halka Saroor Hai, Yeh Teri Nazar Ka Kasoor Hai
Kay Sharab Peena Sikha Diya
By the great great great Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan
length : 23 minutes
lyrics by Mohammad Iqbal Naqibi
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Saturday, July 26, 2008
bad boys of god

today, i weighted 78.8 lowest figure i ever watched on weight machine in last so many years. feel so good.
Friday, July 25, 2008
little of yr time !!
anyways, i got my hair styled tonight. its the shorted i can have. bcaz, bcaz.............bcaz...i m lightest, as far as last 8 yrs concern. i weighted 79.3 this moning. that was awesome to see the figure belowe 80. now lets move 2wards 75kg. its not that far i guess, but it the hardest last 4-5 kgs. i gotta be very strict on my diet now.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
each line suits
In my dreams I'm dying all the time
Then I wake its kaleidoscopic mind
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to lie
So this is goodbye
Tell the truth, you never wanted me,
Tell me...
In my dreams I'm jealous all the time
Then I wake I'm going out of my mind
Going out of my mind
Monday, July 07, 2008
Sunday, July 06, 2008
i m dying......and no one can see that !!
i had no drinks, but feel like i m drunk. seems like i m having first day of the rest of my life, and clock is ticking. I think i will have to go back to the rule #1 of Osho, the rule of expectations.
Lights go out and I can’t be saved
Tides that I tried to swim against
Brought me down upon my knees
Oh I beg, I beg and plead
come out if things aren’t said
Shoot an apple off my head
And a, trouble that can’t be named
Tigers waiting’ to be tamed
Confusion never stops
Closing walls and ticking clocks
Gonna come back and take you home
I could not stop that you now know
come out upon my seas
Curse missed opportunities
Am I, a part of the cure,
Or am I part of the disease
Saturday, July 05, 2008
take off for a new life
in between these messed up life, paragkumar and hetalben fly away to US. first of all, i would like to with them good luck for the further journey called LIFE. we hope, and we know, that they will a much better life than they had in india. this is the only good thing happened in last few weeks. otherwise, its getting worse every passing day. Donno when this will end, but this is the worst part of life i m facing so far. i hope that ride will end soon !!
Thursday, July 03, 2008
life is fucking strange
life is fucking strange. and what i m facing these days, its the strangest part of my life so far. i was never expected that something like this could occur in life. i m surprised, but the shock is yet to come !!
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Happy Birthday Ravi !!
Luxurious Chocolate Brownies with Macadamia Nuts ~ 豪華巧克力布朗尼蛋糕, originally uploaded by L' Atelier Vi.
yaa, usually it shud be a birthday cake with lots of(23) candles on it !! but i choose to celebrate differently. as there was no one to celebrate it with me, i decided to treat myself. and what could be better than a Chocolate Brownie (not u chocolate brownie) to make me feel the happiest person on earth. well, i dreamed something like this, but cudnt have any chocolate brownie, though i wished a lot. it was not a special day after all. just same old routine sunday, but the date was 29th June !!
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Sunday Morning
Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers share some skin
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knew
That someday it would lead me back to you
That someday it would lead me back to you
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave
Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change the weather still together when it ends
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling and I'm calling out to you
Singing someday it'll bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself back home to you
And you may not know
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
Sunday Morning
by Maroon 5
Saturday, June 21, 2008
2 days of hope and eternal life of helplessness !!
i never thought that life would turn like this. last 3 days changed the way i was thinking abt life, people and god. 2 of them were in hospital, where 500 people were praying to god for a person to get up and smile. but i found my and their prayers unanswered. but god should have listen to at least those 2 innocent children's prayer. but he didn't. he just do what he wants to do, never care for anybody. i used to think that everything happens for a reason, for a good reason. but this incident changed my point of view. god is so rigid and merciless that he will do whatever comes to his mind. i dont know what was her mistake that took away her life, but as far as i know, she is the most graceful, chearing, charming, loving person in our family, and of course, in her family too. she never had fight with anyone, she never thought bad things for other. she was the source of happiness among all those sisters and her sisters-in-laws. i m not just saying all these things just for the sake of saying, but its damn true. and we feel miserable on lose of such a soul.
she left a girl of 15 and a boy of 10 behind her. now who will take care of them? is there anyone who can fulfill the place of a good mom for those kids?? i think even god himself cant play that role. god cant do anything ! i think hes helpless too !! he is hopeless !
when i was in hospital with KK, he used to tell me all those things abt their life. how she used to remind him to take medicine on time, how she used to take care of him, her kids and her parents in laws, how she used to call him 3-4 times a day just to make sure that he is safe and sound. but now, ..........i dont have words to explain his agony.
i always believed that god is great, and he can never think bad for anyone. and he always has good reason behind whatever he does. but i cant find or see any good reason behind whatever happened in last 3 days. pls make me believe that this is just a bad dream, and i will wake up soon.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Thursday, June 12, 2008
d way u hate me !!
i just love .............................
...d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me
d way u hate me ..........................................on day 35 !!
Monday, June 09, 2008
she doesnt wanna talk to me!!
i donno what went wrong. i called her up, but she was not interested !! she just hung up !! i was waiting for her call back !! but ...
anyways, just another bad day. shit things happen in life. u get rejected, being hated, being asked to many rubbish Qs, wrongly expected, taken for granted, kicked away, used and ect. list goes on and on. life sucks a lot these days.
feels like i have lost something so special, special like oxygen for life !! i never used to be like this. i was so careless and tensionfree. but now its changed. will i have to keep waiting for the rest of my life ?
Sunday, June 08, 2008
Stop Behaving like a Joker Ravi !!
i had really bad bad start of the day. actually, yesterday has a worse end. woke up at 4 to call up mansi. shes little busy with her jobS !! damn, i m the only fallow with lots of spare time. but anyways, it was sunday, so i had some more spare time today !! hah !! u see, i just start making joker out of me. i m not feeling good today, not feeling good at all. dont know whats wrong, but somethings wrong. may be i m just too aggressive or may be too possessive !! dont know. anyways, sorry for everyone i hurted. i will try to make my self a better person.
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
Monday, June 02, 2008
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Friday, May 23, 2008
i want to write down something, but as usual, i cant the word that can explain what i m thinking. may be this picture can describe something. just like that balloon, i m flying alone. theres is no limit or destination for that balloon, and it neither have that direction as well. the embiance is too sad, may be. same with me, i m a man without any direction and destination. just letting the life draw me where it wants. all the time, i let other people decide what i m suppose to do. not abt perosnal life, but talking abt professional life. i always have power to change my fate, but somehow, i lake that self confidance, that other people can simply shake it easily. but sometimes, i m my own worst enemy. most of the mind i can not make up my mind. my heart belongs to melbourne, but i have to, have to and have to stay here in ahmedabad, for one or other reason. i simply cant choose what my heart wants. may be i m waiting for a miracle, or an opportunity to just leave all worries and fly away somewhere.
but at this point of time, i m completly alone, lost, blankminded, blind, thought less, helpless.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Saturday, May 17, 2008
walk alone
these days i m going through a better, within myself. and i dont know what to do. i m really confused. i m feeeling so alone and isolated. i have lost the direction. or i cant see the light in the darkness. i miss a company. i miss a support. i need that rocket force to start the engine of my mind. oooh god, i m going trough so many personal and semi personal problems. damn....life is miserable.
all i need is just a power start, i just need to develop that 'Go get it' attitude !!
walk alone
I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
and I'm the only one and I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah,
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah
I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line
Of the edge and where I walk alone
Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's alright
Check my vital signs
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah
Ah-ah, Ah-ah
I walk alone
I walk a...
I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk a...
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone...
Boulevard of Broken Dreams
by Green Day


















